Issue #19: $2,295/Month To Avoid Talking To Humans

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Why you're getting this: Welcome to My New Meta, where I (and my wife and business partner, Kirsten) analyze the ever-evolving "business meta" - those unwritten rules and strategies that actually work in modern business, leadership and entrepreneurship.

No pressure to join the journey - unsubscribe anytime (don’t worry, I won’t be notified or offended 😊)

Here’s what I’ve got for you today:

TLDR (The No-BS Version):

• Accidentally became salespeople after buying chargeFUZE distribution rights

• Modern sales meta is all AI and automation

• We're still using the 1990s strategy guide (actual phone calls!)

• Kirsten: 50 cold calls and crushing it

• Greg: 3 calls (mostly to himself)

• Turns out advanced negotiation skills don’t equate to advanced sales skills

• Grab our free online AI-crafted Cold Call Survival Guide and skip the ChatGPT wrestling match. We already did the prompting - you focus on the selling.

Let’s get into it.

Small Talk

Snippet 1 of 3: Disconnection

Let's talk about the fascinating disconnect happening at LandLogic (← our company) right now. Our effort-to-revenue ratio looks less like a business strategy and more like my attempts at document management in my Google Drive - carefully planned chaos.

Here's the thing about our revenue:

• 90% Comes from real estate development (you know, the thing I actually spent three decades doing),

• 5% From our new chargeFUZE venture (portable phone charging that is definitely NOT vending machines)

• 5% From media projects like this newsletter.

• 0% From tech projects like Note Venture (Issue #15: How I Became a Tech Bro Without Learning to Code)

Yet somehow, our effort distribution looks more like this:

• 10% Real Estate (because when you've done something for 30 years, it's basically muscle memory)

• 45% Trying to convince people that chargeFUZE isn't a vending machine

• 45% Writing newsletters about why we spend so much time explaining that chargeFUZE isn't a vending machine

• 0% Creating new apps because my "quick 5-minute research studies" usually turn into unproductive 3-hour YouTube rabbit holes

Snippet 2 of 3: Your Chaotic Mentor

When I started this newsletter, it was basically "Corporate Life Bad, Entrepreneurship Good: A Manifesto by a Slightly Bitter Ex-Executive." But that doesn’t add any value to society, and something interesting happened along the way.

As I shared stories about my daily adventures in business building, people started reaching out - not just about starting businesses, but about levelling up their careers, whether they were employees, entrepreneurs, or students.

Turns out, those 30 years of corporate leadership experience are actually useful for more than just self-deprecating newsletter content.

So we're evolving.

My New Meta isn't just about escaping the corporate world anymore - it's about using real business experience to help you level up your career wherever you are in the game.

Think of it as having a slightly chaotic mentor who's made enough mistakes to fill a weekly newsletter.

Snippet 3 of 3: Speaking Of Having No Idea What We're Doing

Turns out thirty years of negotiating multi-million dollar real estate development deals doesn't automatically translate to being able to make a basic sales call.

Who knew?

Picture this: I can confidently walk into a boardroom full of developers, lawyers, and bankers to negotiate a complex land assembly deal worth millions... but ask me to pick up the phone and call a venue owner about installing a phone charging station?

Suddenly, I'm that kid in high school drama class who memorized Hamlet's entire soliloquy but forgot how to say "hello."

Let's talk about how I managed to turn a simple sales call into an existential crisis...

[Don’t miss the “Greg’s first cold call” reenactment at the end.]

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…for those of you who are new, we usually start the main lesson with a discussion between business partners…

The Great Role Switch: When a Negotiator Becomes a Salesperson

SCENE: Late afternoon in our home office. Kirsten is confidently working through her call list while I'm "strategically preparing" (hiding) behind my laptop.

KIRSTEN: (muting phone) "Remember two months ago when you said buying chargeFUZE would be 'passive income'?"

GREG: (scrolling through AI sales tools) "In my defense, nobody told me we'd have to actually sell things to make money."

KIRSTEN: "You mean in the 'sales and distribution agreement' we signed?"

GREG: "I was distracted by all the cool charging station pictures!"

KIRSTEN: "For someone who spent 30 years selling real estate development ideas..."

GREG: (puffing up importantly) "I was a President, dear. Presidents don't make calls - they receive calls. People used to line up outside my corner office just to get 5 minutes of my time!"

KIRSTEN: "And how's that working out for your chargeFUZE sales?"

GREG: (deflating) "I've successfully received zero incoming calls about buying charging stations. But I did make three cold calls last week!"

KIRSTEN: (raising eyebrow) "You mean when you called your own voicemail three times to practice your pitch?"

GREG: (defensively) "That counts as sales training!"

KIRSTEN: "Maybe because nobody knows we exist unless we tell them?"

GREG: (scrolling LinkedIn) "I'm sure if we just optimize our social media presence..."

Main Lesson: The Surprisingly Simple Sales Strategy Nobody Wants to Use

Remember when I told you about spending $27,000 on fancy e-commerce tools during the pandemic ( Issue #14: The $27,000 Pandemic Side Hustle Experiment if you're curious)? Well, history almost repeated itself with chargeFUZE.

My first instinct was to build an elaborate sales machine:

What I Almost Built:

• AI-powered LinkedIn automation ($599/month)

• Email sequence software ($299/month)

• Lead scraping tools ($199/month)

• Predictive analytics platform ($899/month)

• Chatbot for our website ($299/month)

Total: $2,295/month to avoid talking to humans

What Actually Worked:

• Kirsten's phone ($0)

• Phone number list from Google ($0)

• Coffee for courage ($4.75)

Total: Price of a latte

The Numbers Don't Lie (Even Though I Tried to Ignore Them)

Let's break down Kirsten's "outdated" approach:

• 50 cold calls made

• 15 actual conversations

• 3 venue meetings scheduled

• 30% conversation rate

• 6% meeting conversion rate

• Time invested: 3 hours

My "strategic research" results:

• 17 sales tools researched

• 3 calls made (to my voicemail for practice)

• 0 meetings scheduled

• 100% self-rejection rate

• Time invested: 27 hours

• Excuses generated: ∞

This Week’s Lesson: Why Simple Works (When We Let It)

Here's what we learned about just picking up the phone:

1. Real-Time Feedback

   • No wondering if your email was caught in spam

   • Instant answers to objections

   • Actual humans telling you exactly why they're saying no

2. The Competition is Hiding

   • Everyone else is too scared to call

   • Your voice stands out in a sea of automated LinkedIn messages

   • Being human is your unfair advantage

3. Faster Learning Loop

   • Each call makes the next one better

   • Pitch evolves in real-time based on responses

   • More fails = faster improvement

4. The Science of Talking to Strangers

   • Research shows we consistently underestimate how much people want to engage

   • Everyone else is just as nervous as you are

   • Most people actually enjoy unexpected conversations (even if we don't believe it)

   Grab our online AI-crafted Cold Call Survival Guide.

Greg's First Cold Call - A Dramatic Reenactment

TIME: 3:47 PM LOCATION: Home Office

MISSION: Call one venue owner

PREPARATION TIME: 4 hours

ACTUAL CALL TIME: 37 seconds

PRE-CALL CHECKLIST:

• Practice script (17 revisions)

• Research target's entire LinkedIn history

• Memorize their company's mission statement

• Do vocal warm-ups

• Consider career change

• Practice with voicemail three more times

THE CALL:

VENUE OWNER: "Hello?"

GREG: "Hi! This is Greg Mills with... uh... you know phones? I mean charging! We do phone charging. Not phones. Unless you need phones? We could probably figure out phones..."

VENUE OWNER: "Sorry, who is this?"

GREG: "Right! Yes! Greg! I used to be very important. Had a corner office and everything. Now I sell... wait, no, we don't sell, we provide strategic charging solutions for... hello?"

Call disconnected

AFTERMATH:

• Time spent analyzing what went wrong: 3 hours

• LinkedIn automation tools purchased: 4

• Comfort ice cream consumed: 1 pint

• Times Kirsten said, "It gets easier": 12

• Times Greg believed her: 0

Curated Links: The Modern Sales Stack

For all you fellow cold-call-phobes out there, here are the AI tools I spent way too much time researching instead of actually making calls:

🤖 Conversica: The AI Assistant That Never Gets Nervous 

Think of it as hiring a fearless sales rep who:

• Never needs coffee breaks

• Doesn't sweat when sending emails

• Won't accidentally call their own voicemail for practice (my strategy)

• Handles email and SMS like a pro

Perfect for: People like me who want to automate away their phone anxiety

🎮 Air.ai: The RPG Character That Makes Better Calls Than Me 

Imagine an AI that:

• Handles 40-minute calls without nervous sweating

• Never forgets its script or accidentally mentions its former corner office

• Actually learns from conversations (unlike certain newsletter writers)

• Makes cold calls 24/7 without needing comfort ice cream

Fun fact: This AI makes longer, more successful calls than my entire cold-calling career.

Best for: When you want your AI to have better phone etiquette than a former corporate president who's still afraid of his own phone.

💭 The Tool That Actually Worked After all this research guess what we ended up using?

• Kirsten's phone

• Google Calendar

• Basic human courage

• Sometimes, the old meta is still the best meta.

Note: I may have spent more time researching these tools than the combined time Kirsten spent actually closing deals. But hey, at least now we know what we're NOT using!

THAT’S A WRAP

Remember: In a world obsessed with automation,

Stay curious and keep building (and maybe make one cold call this week)

Greg "Still Practicing With Voicemail" Mills

P.S. If you've got any embarrassing cold call stories that will make me feel better about mine, hit reply. I need the emotional support.

If you liked what you read and are not a subscriber yet, join the crowd:

Here are some back issues if you are just not sure yet:

Issue #18: The 5-Step Guide to Losing $65k in Salary 

Issue #17: How To Fail Less Spectacularly In 2025 

Issue #16: The 2024 Lab Report: Experiments, Explosions, and Expensive Lessons 

Looking for more to read:

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Note: Some of the links in the newsletter are affiliate links. I believe in transparency and honesty, so if you want to know more, visit Full Partner Disclosure for details.